Well. I'm now signed off for a month due to work pressure. The mere mention of it sets me off at the moment - feelings of anxiety, nervousness and a sense of inadequacy as well as paralysing indecision. I had to take some files back to the office and I couldn't go in office hours because I can't face the others. I got there and sat in the car for 10 minutes plucking up the courage to go in. When I did go in I dumped everything and left quickly, feeling sick the whole time. Lots of work to do there!
I find that exercise helps which brings me to goals - small, pathetic ones but none-the-less goals which give me a sense of achievement.
In the gym on Tuesday I got on the exercise bike and, as is my wont, pedalled hard for 10 minutes to warm up. I usually manage 5.5 to 5.8km and have been aiming for 6km for some time. This time I managed 6.13km. It felt so good, motivated me for the rest of the session and set me up for the rest of the day.
I have signed up for the Cycle to Work scheme and will be buying a bike through salary sacrifice. The process is almost complete. I have chosen a bike (Merida Crossway) and am just waiting for the certificate to arrive so that I can go and buy it. At long last I will have something that is easy to ride and more that capable of the sort of riding I do.
To end this ramble I went out yesterday and intended to do a shortish route lasting about an hour. It lasted a bit longer (1.5 hours) and I went further than intended. That said it was a great ride, the weather was ok and the route scenic. It is easy to become jaded about the scenery when one is immersed in it but the whole point of rides around here is to enjoy it and breathe in the views and surprise encounters on the way round, in this case a new-born Welsh Black calf. The hills, fields, Pheasants in the road that try and run ahead before taking to the wing in a clatter of feathers and clucking. All this goes without saying most of the time.
Here it is.
Heads are still harder than bikes to deal with.